Friday, April 28, 2006

We Made It!

Well, tomorrow my single parent adventure ends (Lord willing). I will be extremely thankful that I will have my husband home--if I can get over the bitterness that is eating inside me of his having a sort of 10 day vacation, so to speak, from everyday life. I have been quite cranky with him the last few days. I am worn out emotionally, physically, and spiritually. I have a nagging headache that has been hovering over me the last 4 days, I am tired of everyone screaming, pushing, nagging, and whining over the littlest of things. Blakley woke the whole family up at 5:40 this morning by yelling from her top bunk that she had something she wanted to tell me. So, I took all three kids, sat them on the couch, covered them with a blanket, turned on Playhouse Disney, and told them not to ask for milk or breakfast until I woke up again. This lasted well for 45 minutes then they were all up chasing each other and yelling. So, we had an early start.

Tonight was Parents Night Out at church--what a blessing! I had 4 hours of quiet solitude! The kids had a blast eating pizza, making crafts and watching a movie. We were all in great spirits when we all got home. I spent some money we probably can't afford at Kohl's in the maternity section, we'll see if I will keep them.

Tomorrow is Jed's last Soccer Game. I am kind of sad, it has been a fun experience--much better than T-ball, which we start again in 3 weeks.

Jed turns 5 in two weeks, I can't think about it too much because I get sad. It has gone so fast, just like everyone said it would----he is so excited about his GI Joe party we are planning, hope it turns out fun!

Jadyn was playing in the kitchen today while I was doing laundry, and she dropped something and yelled at the top of her lungs, "OH, PISS!" trying not to laugh, I asked her where she learned that word (I hate that word, I prefer OH, CRAP!) She smiled and said, "Grandma Kathy." Thanks Grandma for teaching her that word during your visit last week!

I think I have figured out a way to not go to Sonic twice a day. If you do not know, I go to Sonic twice a day for a Route 44 ice water with extra ice and a lemon. I drink so much more water this way and go many days without a diet coke! Well, my children are absolutely sick of going there multiple times a day, so today I picked up several lemons at Market Street, bought gallons of water (Lubbock water is nasty!) and proceeded to Sonic where I bought a bag of Sonic Ice! It cost me a little over a dollar for a big bag of their ice, which is what I love about Sonic---let's see if this works. I know they will miss seeing my blue Explorer pulling up everyday to spend 38 cents for my daily fix, but my kiddos should be much happier!!!

That's all my random thoughts for right now, have a great weekend!

Monday, April 24, 2006

Day 5 and Counting

Well, it is day 5 of being a single parent and it is beggining to look up. It seems that my usual 24-48 hours of adjustment took 4 days this time. Today was actually good and I found myself enjoying the kids instead of counting down to bed time. Sad I know. My weekend was a bit stressful. Saturday I found out that my cell phone had stopped working. We do not have a land line phone as that is something we chose to cut out when we began our "strict" budget. It would not have been a big deal except that the thought occurred to me that if I had an emergency, I would have no way of getting a hold of anyone. This freaked me out--if you know our history of drama when Justin is out of town (including ER visits, strep throat, my Grandpa passing away, etc.)--you would be freaked out a bit as well. I emailed my mom and gave her a heads up in case she needed to get a hold of me it would have to be through email. I really thought she would be a bit more concerned than she was--her response was that she thought it was comical and didn't seem concerned at all. All the while, on Saturday the kids were at each other constantly..... Sunday brought some solace as I sat in church enjoying my "quiet" time in worship, Sunday School brought adult conversation that I had been lacking with Justin gone and no phone to talk to anyone.

Our Small Group Sunday night was exactly what I needed--time with friends, encouragement, and discussion on how God is and needs to be the Head of the House--not my spouse. Even though I know this and proclaim it, it is good to visit it again because I find myself, all too often, totally relying on Justin to fulfill my needs. I don't mean to do this nor do I want to put him in that position, it is my human nature to rely on Justin for our security and provision. I really notice that I do it when he is out of town. My prayer life triples when Justin is gone. I am continually praying for patience, guidance and protection. However, when he is home, I do not worry about our protection, I assume that Justin will protect us, when in actuality only God can do this. I want to remember this....I want my prayer life to continue to be tripled no matter where my husband may be in the world. I want to totally rely on God, for He is our security and provision--not my husband.

Ok off my soap box. Today we had Children's Day Out. A good time for the kids to be with their friends. Our wonderful Max (one of our college students) came over this evening for a couple of hours and gave me a break--I was able to go to Sprint and get a new phone, run to Home Depot and buy flowers, and eat a quiet dinner of Chic-Fil-A in my car before coming home to my babies. It is amazing what a couple of hours break can do for you. I feel refreshed and peaceful. We had fun running through the sprinklers when I got home, a fun bath time (which is amazing for me--I hate to give baths!) and read books, prayers and blessings---a good end to the day! Tomorrow, we will plant flowers, and hopefully get to go to the Science Spectrum if things hold up so well! Let's hope so! I'll let you know!!!

Friday, April 21, 2006

Deal or No Deal

One of our favorite TV Shows, as of late, is Deal or No Deal. Justin and I are yelling right along with the audience and telling them to take the deal or not. I have found that the 3rd offer is always a pretty safe deal--usually a good amount of money especially if you are not a gambling kind of guy. Tonight I was watching while my 2 year old, Jadyn, played with her dolls and stroller. She picked up on the guys name and kept yelling his name and then yelling NO DEAL to the tv screen. I was very entertained watching her give her Curious George a bath with a wipe and yell at the TV. Then two thoughts hit me:

1. Do I/Could I/Should I play Deal or No Deal with the kids? It could be a great reward/consequence thing if I could get all the details ironed out in my head. But, I could also use it just as a manipulation tool--which I do not want to do. I'll have to think this through some more.

Number 2. How many times to I play Deal or No Deal with God? God gives me a deal and I say NO DEAL--waiting for a bigger and better offer. I find myself daily struggling with material possessions. I am constantly looking on the internet/paper/tv for the perfect house for our ever-so-growing family, and checking out websites for a newer suburban or a mini-van. Although, when I look at what this family has and what God has blessed us with I am in ashamed of my lack of satisfaction. We have a reliable car--no car payment, we do have a great house--2 blocks from church(where Justin is the College Minister), a big backyard that the kids love, and we have been able to do ministry here. It is a place that people feel comfortable coming to and not worry about spilling or messing something up. That is awesome. When I think about what we do have--what God has offered me materially (not to even get into salvation, mercy, love, redemption...that's a whole other entry--with much more respect and reverence) I want to slam my hand on the button and scream DEAL!!!

Have a great weekend!

Thursday, April 20, 2006

Chaos and Single Parenting

Today is the first of 10 days that I will be a "single mother". I always find that when Justin is out of town the first 24-48 hours are completely out of control. The kids seem to always test me to my limits~and 98% of the time I tend to lose my temper. After the first 2 days, we all seem to settle down and live life like normal (whatever that is!) Jed will stay up with me the first night and cuddle, then sleep in our bed. About 5am Blakley will wonder in with a leaky diaper, and 20-30 minutes later Jadyn will begin to cry for milk or a light on. All I would like is for everyone to sleep --in their OWN beds-- until 8:00am, that would make for a great beginning to a day!

Today has been no exception. We woke up to cloudy skies, so I sent them out pretty early so they could get at least some energy out before the "down pour". Blakley and Jed have begun this wrestling thing that I thought only older siblings did. Constantly, they were pushing and bugging each other, and of course, Jadyn could not be left out. So, I think someone was crying at any given point in the day. I think I "threatened" them with everything they own or want. I have gotten pretty good at tuning them out, however, I don't want to be one of those moms who is totally out of touch with the going-ons of their kids.

Let's hope that tomorrow will bring sunny skies, happy hearts, and sisterly and brotherly love!

Gotta go, I thought they were all tucked away sleeping, but the youngest is now crying and about to wake the other 2!

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Gold Fish and Red Jelly Beans

Science was NEVER my strong point in school. In fact, I dropped Biology 110 twice in college before painfully taking Chemistry 101 (the summer after my last semester) to fullfill my Science requirement. Science was always the subject I chose to "skip" when time ran out during my 7 years of teaching 4th and 5th grades. So, having an almost 5 year old boy who LOVES to figure things out has been quite eye-opening for me. Since Spring, Jed pretty much lives outside. He disects bugs, studies different flowers (weeds!), and likes to figure out how things work.

Easter afternoon, the family--my in-laws were in town--was enjoying the beautiful afternoon out on the back deck. The kids had finished their hunt for eggs and were enjoying the jelly beans hidden inside. Jed was in and out of the house doing this and that. As I stepped into the kitchen to grab my water, my eye caught the fish bowl sitting on top of the microwave. Interestingly, the water was bright red. I immediately called for Jed and demanded that he give me an explanation for why the fish's water was red. He explained that he just wanted to know if the fish liked jelly beans as much as he did. Instead of laughing (which is probably what I should have done) I overreacted (which I tend to do a lot) and told him to say goodbye to his fish because he just killed him. Jed said, "ok, bye fish" and was not too sad. After calming down, and my husband and in-laws thinking that was funny, I began to feel guilty, went back in the kitchen and proceeded to "save" the fish. I changed the water quickly, and said a quick little prayer that the fish might live. Yes, the fish is still alive today, I think it might have enjoyed its sugar-rush from the red jelly bean. After all, red is my favorite jelly bean, why would a fish not like it? So, if you ever need a Science Experiement--I recommend Gold Fish and Red Jelly Beans.

Monday, April 17, 2006

Growing up in the 70's

A friend of mine sent this to me, and I laughed out loud the whole way through. Memories swarmed my head of me and my sister growing up, I wonder what our children will write about when they are 30 years old!

If you were a little girl in the 70's...
1. You had that Fisher Price Doctor's Kit with a stethoscope that actually worked.
2. You owned a bicycle with a banana seat and a plastic basket with flowers on it.
3. You learned to skate with actual skates (not roller blades) that had metal wheels or if you were lucky to have the plastic wheels for the rink they had a big fluffy ball on the laces
4. You thought Gopher from Love Boat was cute (admit it!)
5. You had nightmares after watching Fantasy Island or BattleStar Galactica.
6. You had rubber boots for rainy days and Moon boots for snowy days. YEAH!
7. You had either a "bowl cut" or "pixie," not to mention the "Dorothy Hamill" because your Mom was sick of braiding your hair. People sometimes thought you were a boy.
8. Your Holly Hobbie sleeping bag was your most prized possession.
9. You wore a poncho, gauchos, and knickers.
10. You begged Santa for the electronic game, Simon.
11. You had the Donnie and Marie dolls with those pink and purple satiny shredded outfits.
12. You spent hours in your backyard on your metal swing set with the trapeze. The swing set tipped over at least once.
13. You had homemade ribbon barrettes in every imaginable color. or better yet, the Hello Kitty hair twists in every color
14. You had a pair of Doctor Scholl's sandals (the ones with hard sole > & the buckle).
15. You wanted to be Laura Ingalls Wilder really bad; you wore that Little House on the Prairie-inspired plaid, ruffle shirt with the high neck in at least one school picture; and you despised Nellie Olson!
16. You wanted your first kiss to be at a roller rink.
17. Your hairstyle was described as having "wings" or "feathers" and you kept it "pretty" with the comb you kept in your back pocket.
18. You know who Strawberry Shortcake is, as well as her friends, Blueberry Muffin and Huckleberry Pie.
19. You carried a Muppets lunch box to school and it was metal, not plastic. With the thermos inside!
20. You and your girlfriends would fight over which of the Dukes of Hazzard was your boyfriend.
21. Every now and then "It's a Hard Knock Life" from the movie, "Annie" will pop into your brain and you can't stop singing it the whole day.
22. YOU had Star Wars action figures, too!
23. It was a big event in your household each year when the "Wizard of Oz" would come on TV. Your mom would break out the popcorn and sleeping bags!
24. You often asked your Magic-8 ball the question: "Who will I marry. Shaun Cassidy, Leif Garrett, or Rick Springfield?"
25. You completely wore out your Grease, Saturday Night Fever, and Fame soundtrack record album
26. You tried to do lots of arts and crafts, like yarn and Popsicle-stick God's eyes, decoupage, or those weird potholders made on a plastic loom. Pot holders - I believe they were called loom loopers.
27. You made Shrinky-Dinks and put iron-on kittens on your t-shirts!
28. You used to tape record songs off the radio by holding your portable tape player up to the speaker
29. You couldn't wait to get the free animal poster that came when you ordered books from the Weekly Reader book club. Double score if it was a teddy bear dressed in clothing.
30. You learned everything you needed to know about girl issues from Judy Blume books (Are you there God, It's me, Margaret.)
31. You thought Olivia Newton John's song "Physical" was about aerobics.
32. You wore friendship pins on your tennis shoes, or & nbsp; shoelaces with heart or rainbow designs.
33. You wanted to be a Solid Gold dancer.
34. You had a Big Wheel with a brake on the side, and a Sit-n-Spin.
35. You had subscriptions to Dynamite and Tiger Beat.
36. You spent all your allowance pop rocks and dr. pepper to see if your mouth would explode. 37. You drown yourself in Love's Baby Soft - which was the first real perfume you owned!

Remember that when we dress our kids today and think they are so cute and "trendy" that one day they will look back on their pictures and laugh about how goofy they look!

Sunday, April 16, 2006

Are you Using Your Honoring Voice???

As I was reading a blog from another mom, she had a top 10 list of random topics--one topic being "the top 7 things I say most often". The one that struck me was "are you using your honoring voice?" I immediately looked at my husband and said that is what we need to be asking our kids (as they seem to have become quite the whiners lately). However, the thought struck me that it is quite possible that I might too should be asking myself if 'I am using my honoring voice?'. As I look back over the day, what I remember most is the nagging, harsh tone, and dare I say "yelling" at the kids to pick up this or do that or don't do that...Are my whining kids picking up bad habits from mom? My goal for this week is to stop and make sure I am using an honoring voice--a voice that honors my God, my husband, and my children.

Other random thoughts:
Today is Easter. My husband and I struggled on how to down play the secular/Easter bunny stuff. Although in our heads it was quite easy to say--no Easter Bunny, no egg hunts....but we still gave them a "present" just from us and we did color and hide/hunt for eggs in the backyard. I feel like we gave-in so to speak, but when I think about Christmas, I am not sure if I am willing to give up "Santa" and all that....why is my heart in the wrong place? Why is it so hard to be different in this culture??? Something to think about.....

First Post

My blog title is obvious to those who know me. I am the youngish old woman who lives in a "small - sensible" shoe with 3 kids 4 AND UNDER, and 1 on the way!!! - more than I know what to do with. Fruitful seed and fruitful soil!!!! Enjoy my thoughts on life and parenting and chaos, that's really what it is - my thoughts on my chaos...ordered by a grace-filled and humorous God.